Taking Stock

12.31.06, 3:23 pm, Burbank, CA

It is the end of the year. Time for me to look back, see what resolutions I've made progress on, see what resolutions I need to make up for '07. And just for the record:

NO, I AM NOT STAYING HOME ON NEW YEAR'S EVE! NO, I AM NOT SPENDING THE LAST NIGHT OF THE YEAR TAKING STOCK OF MY LIFE AND MAKING MY 2007 RESOLUTIONS TO LOSE WEIGHT, SAVE MORE MONEY AND TO GIVE UP DATING ON THE WEST COAST.

NOPE, NOT ME. NOT THE HELL ME.

I did the resolutions earlier today. No, seriously. Citizen Journalist plans well … Of course, I’m not banking blogs to post occasionally throughout the week. Seriously, who does that?

Anyway, as for my goals for the new year, I'm not copping to all of them here publicly, cuz who needs that kind of pressure. But there is one that I'm working on,
thinking about,
weighing the pros and cons of.
Something I've thought about acting on in the past, something we all think about but could never, would never. Something that would create complication, may ostracize me with some, attract me to others, get me new gigs, and kicked out of old ones. It’s simple, it’s revolutionary.

It’s … no, not yet… I'm getting to it.

The resolution for the past couple of years has been to INVITE CHAOS. And I know that's very existential, pretty indefinable and undeniably the resolution of a neurotic chick. But it's really paid off. After one dead boyfriend, several dead family members and a dead career, I battened down the hatches of my life. For the last couple of years, I've been in the basement of my heart, (which is an add-on to the house of my soul) staring at the hammer I could use to bang out the nails to my self-inflicted coffin. INVITING CHAOS has certainly helped to remind me to poke my head out of the bomb shelter to see if there's any life left that I can latch on to.
After 5 years of no dating and hardly any friends – five years surviving a financially driven move to LA, I now have some functioning friends and a couple 3-month dating forays under my belt. 'Course after giving it a go in DATING LA – I don’t know…

…

I’m a little nervous about going much further on this blog entry ……

I’m still thinking about this resolution… I don’t know. It’s pretty big.

Eh, it ain’t THAT big.

I’ll get back with you on it.

For now… I’m out.